Good evening, Manila.
I'm rudeboy.
It's recently come to my attention that I have only one piddling entry for February on this blog.
There are only three reasons why I fail to write regular entries :
1. Too much work to do.
2. Too little to write about.
3. Too depressed to give a flying fuck.
The answer, in this case, is that I've been very busy lately. Jetsetting to Indochina with Inès de la Fressange, Karl Lagerfeld, and the ghost of Halston. Deconstructing the oeuvre of Erich von Stroheim at the Palladium with Lisa Bonet, Koo Stark, and the Duchess of Cornwall. Imbibing sophisticated adult refreshments for three straight nights until the crack of dawn with Ted Skakel, Charles Manson, and the Boston Strangler.
But to make up for the lack of posts on this shortest of months, I've enlisted the help of none other than Oscar-nominee Chloë Sevigny*, to enlighten us with her take on several events that, and I quote, "have recently come to my attention."
Let's start off with this morning's Oscars, and work our way back from there.
Enjoy.
Something for my fellow Piscean B-Days:
And finally, another dig at V-Day:
* In actuality, comedian and writer Drew Droege, who has made viral video sensations out of parodying the name-dropping actress/it girl/designer/hipster.
so, have you watched the oscar nominees for this this season?
ReplyDeleteI've only seen Hugo, in 3-D, at The Bijoux with Anita Ekberg, Gavin Rossdale, and Justin Theroux, clad in a winter pea coat from Zara, a jaunty wool beret from Comme des Garçons, vintage corduroy trousers from Charivari, and motorcycle boots from Thierry Mugler, while indulging in delightful croissants sponsored by Le Coeur de France, and bottomless cappucino from Gloria Jean's.
DeleteI suggest you watch "A Separation." :D
DeleteIt's recently come to my attention that Asghar Farhadi's A Separation has won Best Foreign-Language Film at this year's Oz-Kars.
DeleteI'm made to understand that the film is about the domestic drama of an Iranian family, and not a retelling of the fairy-tale romance of Oscar tit-baring Jennifer Lopez and the acclaimed Latino singer Skeletor which ended in tragedy.
"With my great aunt...the countess!" FTW! This should've been posted before the 14th. Save me from the self-inflicted despair and the flesh slashing ritual. C'mon! And jeez, the remix of Human Behaviour by the end made it more than perfect. Awesome Mr. Rudeboy!
ReplyDelete.
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Ahmnn, there's should be a message for the ghost of Halston but I lost it together with the stash of magazine my momma burned back in mid-90s. I was 8 or 9 then.
It's recently come to my attention..that you commemorated Valen-teens by quoting liberally from the acclaimed musical Wicked, with music and lyrics by Stephen Schwartz, and book by Winnie Holzman, based upon the novel by Gregory Maguire.
DeleteApropos of the current Oscar telecast, you should've listened instead to Bjork's Human Behavior, from her self-titled debut solo album, while drowning your emotions in a fine bottle of Beaujolais, taking out your frustrations on a decadent repast of ostrich steak and truffles from the chefs at French Laundry, and discussing the relative merits of swine when compared to men over consommé and croutons with Abigail Van Buren, Melissa Joan Hart, and Princess Gloria von Thurn und Taxis.
As for the magazines burned by your mamma, one hopes they did not include any issues of Diana Vreeland-vintage Vogue, Stephen Saban-era Details, or 1981-85 Jingle Extra Hot.
Quel dommage!
Monsieur, I am fascinated. How d'you know of my expertise on the "relative merits of swine when compared to men?" I literally fell for one! Alright, maybe two. But no, I never had consommé neither croutons or any of fancy, lecturing about it. Instead, I had bitter gourd. Haha. I played pretend, though. Thought I was Marie Antoinette. It never worked.
Delete.
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As for the magazines, well, I wasn't gay enough then to know the value of such stuffs so I passed on.
The great Gossip Girl blogger-socialite-and-ambassador-of-romance Kane once called my attention to a statement I made in one of my early blog entries, to the effect that "All men are pigs."
DeleteI maintain this assertation and have found that it has served me as wonderfully well as the role of women -namely to keep quiet and do as they're told -served the deliciously-diabolical designs of the Marquise de Merteuil in the superb 1988 film adaptation of Choderlos de Laclos' Dangerous Liaisons, portrayed to pernicious perfection by that egregiously-overlooked thespian Glenn Close, who was once more given the cold shoulder by the Academy just this recently-concluded Os-Karr season.
L'autrichienne et la reine de France Marie-Antoinette herself may have toyed with notions of romance - consider le scandale Fersen- but even she learned to recognize true love in Louis-Auguste; a great and genuine love that was her one remaining treasure as the Revolution took throne, family, and eventually her own life from her.
Your own recent blog entry holds the key to your liberté from the perfumed gardens of romantic illusions you have willingly lost yourself in. As evinced in the sumptuous 2009 Milanese tragedy I Am Love by the ethereal, epicene goddess Tilda Swinton - yet another criminally under-appreciated jewel in the crown of modern cinema - you yourself are love, dearest DB. And your passion and unconditional love overrules all, even the crumbling of the haute bourgeoisie.
As that flawed, fallen, foibled yet forever fabulous Nubian songstress Whitney Houston once trilled: "Learning to love yourself/ Is the greatest love of all."
Or as Chloë herself asserted in her Valien-teens episode above : "In other news, I've recently commenced a relationship - with myself."
i'm extremely disappointed that Tilda Swinton ("Let's Talk About Kevin") wasn't nominated for Oscar Best Actress.
ReplyDeleteShe was bumped by that Rooney Mara. I think Noomi Rapace is a better Lisbeth Salander.
It's recently come to my attention that I have never seen any of Ms. Patricia Rooney Mara's films: from her debut in Urban Legends: Bloody Mary (2005), to the disappointing box-office remake of Nightmare On Elm Street (2010), and now, if critics are to be believed, the equally dismal American warming-over of The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo.
DeleteKatherine Matilda Swinton, on the other hand, can do no wrong.
I want a Miriam Santiago version :D
ReplyDeleteAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! She'd just be SOOOO mad and dropping big words and legalese all over the place.
DeleteI love it.