A New Gay Haven

Image from here.

A colleague of mine - Santi (first and previous appearance here) - just recently came back from an off-season sortie to Puerto Galera, that ertswhile gayest of gay ports in these 7,100++ islands. I say "erstwhile" because what was supposed to be his 3 days of much-needed R&R turned out to be 3 Days of Darkness instead.


Far from being relaxed and recharged, Santi was livid with indignation as he huffed and puffed about the rude awakening he received in Galé - foremost the ordinance that forbade the playing of loud music at the bars from midnight onwards.


Having heard tales of homo horror from last year's Puerto Galera pilgrimages (the tanods' tenacity in flushing out the nocturnal hunting bekis from the batcave, among other things), I've come to the conclusion that the good local government of Puerto Galera is slowly but surely making it clear that they don't want our kind tainting their good name. 

Cinematic depiction of the Great Beki Batcave Banishments.

As a matter of fact, according to Santi, one local councilwoman actually intimated just that:

Santi : But what about the party people? We're the ones who've helped 

Galera become the tourist attraction it is today.

Councilwoman : Well, we'd rather prefer it wasn't so.

Ruffled feather boas aside, though, I shan't pass judgment upon Galé. Every town has the right to formulate and enforce its local ordinances as it sees fit, and if the town fathers have decided to remove the Gay from Gaylera, the Mhin from Mhindoro, say No to Homo and reinvent itself as a family-friendly holiday spot, well, then so be it. 


We'll just have to take the vaunted Pink Peso somewhere else. Someplace that actually wants it.

At least we'll still have each other - until I catch you in the batcave, that is.

Thus, my drinking bekis and I have decided to take the ongoing "It's more fun in the Philippines!" meme to a more local and niche-particular level: that of the search for the next Island of Lost Souls.


Here then, ladies and gentlemen, are just some of our proposed taglines for potential candidates vying for the fabled Pink Peso. With this year's Semana Santa landing on the first week of April, there's still plenty of time for us to scout around for the next local hotspot to have the honor of Gayskull being the next Gay Summer Capital of the Philippines. 


Kung may Puerto, may Prinsesa. (Proposed come-on: Unspoiled beaches, lush forests, and the world's longest underground gay grotto.)


Kalibo. Libo-libong Kalibugan. (Proposed come-on: the Kati-Katihan Festival. Hala Hada !)


Agi, A-Gogo Sa Agoo! (Proposed come-on: Gay Marriage aka La Union de Maricon.)


Bawal Daot, Bayot, Oo: Dao. (Proposed come-on: Military surplus/PX goods, and a brother that's not a pig !)


Makibeki Sa Macabebe! (Proposed come-on: Cabalen Aljur Abrenica giving you a taste of Pampanga's Best. Nanung burat mo, pohtang beki?)


Gen xXx Sa GenSan (Proposed come-on: The annual "Kalinlangan" festival, plus the opportunity to go way, way down south on Gerald Anderson as Poster Boy for his hometown.)


Bienvenue à Gay Aparri! (Proposed come-on: The new "Iba Ang Ibanag" festival trumps Lovapalooza with its year-round French-kissing competition.)


Sa Piling Ng Makiling Ang Mapiling Maria. (Proposed come-on: the first-ever Miss Gay Mutya ng Makiling. The winner gets to climb to the summit in heels and dethrone the incumbent diwata, who has held the crown for hundreds of years.)


Mas Mahalay sa Malaybalay. (I think this is pretty self-explanatory.)




And so far, my favorite:


I Want. 
You Want. 
We All Want...Dakak.




Feel free to add your candidates - and taglines - in the Comments.


And so long, Sodom and Galera.