Wednesday, October 12, 2011

National Coming Out Day

Why, yes, Virginia, there is such a thing.

NCOD (as opposed to NOCD*) is 

" internationally observed civil awareness day celebrating individuals who publicly identify as bisexual, gay, lesbian, transgender, or queer-coming out regarding one's sexual orientation and/or gender identity being akin to a cultural rite of passage for LGBT people. The holiday is observed annually by members of the  queer community and their straight supporters on October 11."

Sooooooo yesterday, but hey, any excuse to party, y'all.

I'm a bit of a fence-sitter when it comes to this whole "coming out" business. Sure, I'm practically out to all the Malate queers and characters, as well as to most of the significant people in my life. My family, of course, does not discuss my sexual preference, but then again, we don't discuss the sexual preference of my brother, either, and he's disgustingly straight. I suppose my mom just wants us to keep believing babies are made when two people really really really love one another and have a stork on speed-dial.

Buuuuuuttttt, I digress.

I'd love to hold forth on the merits and demerits of "coming out", but I think you'd enjoy the different opinions expressed here. While you're at it, feel free to post your own opinions in the Comments Section (theirs or mine or both) and/or gawk at the allegedly-closeted celebrities they practically outed there.

Too easy.

Hey, baby.


For my part - being the contrarian dick and sick puppy that I loudly and proudly am - in observance of this LGBT event, I shall leave you with my take on the insufferably unctuous "It Gets Better" campaign.


And with that, I'm outtie.

Or not.

*Not Our Class, Darling. Best delivered with champagne in one hand, disdain in the other.


  1. same with my family, there are things better left unsaid.

  2. Paulo Avelino is so yummy. haha

    I can see why there'd be a day for this. I just think it would be so weird if you were the parent and your kid's like so, it's national coming out day today. *wink wink* I'd totally freak. lolz

  3. @ Nyl : Mmm I could eat Paulo Avelino with some fava beans and a nice Chianti *slurpslurpslurpslurplurp*

    And yes, we should have NCOD here, as well, Uncomfortable hilarity would ensue.

    @ Fatal Attraction Chick: Did they know you boiled the bunnies, Alex?

  4. Despite the benefit, I don't think Aljur is. Wait, is he?

  5. @ Manech : The thing with "sexual preference speculation" is that it's difficult to tell if it's based on any solid facts or if it's simple wish-fulfillment.

    Having said that, Machete is in the middle because he's supposedly the common denominator between Exhibit A and Exhibit C. Which is all so silly, really. Nothing wrong with being friends, is there?

  6. That's one of my problems, actually. Some "solid facts" presented are often suspect. What's the deal with proving one's sexual preference anyway? If they want to come out, they will come out. If not, I don't see any reason to press. But that's just me.

    Though, of course, it'd be so fun to see these three men at play. :]

  7. @ Manech : " What's the deal with proving one's sexual preference anyway? If they want to come out, they will come out. If not, I don't see any reason to press."


    One thing I dislike about the gay community at large is the predilection for "outing." There have been a great many debates about this, but I believe in outing only as a means of self-defense, i.e. I have no problems outing someone who bashes and/or is bigoted against (other) gays.

    But there's a lot of fear and self-loathing, as you know. Every time you hear a gay person, whether he be effem or butch, muttering under his breath that "Hmp, bakla din naman yan, eh.", the contempt and derision is palpable. It makes me pity the poor private individual who wants to keep his sexual preferences private . Extrapolate that to a public figure whose livelihood depends on public perception and popularity, and it's not at all surprising that the Tom Cruises and Will Smiths of the world have armies of publicists to spin facts in their favor.

    As you said, if I want to come out, I'll come out. If not, it's nobody's goddamned business.

    Oh. And as for these three men at play: yes, yes, oh, yes.

  8. So if someone were to ask you, "Are you gay?" how would you answer that? It would be easy to say that it's none of their business but that would be almost tantamount to saying that you're gay. One can also ask back, "why are you interested to know?" But one knows being evasive will not cut it. Any ideas?

  9. @ Kryptonite User: Honestly? It would depend on any number of factors. If you were a close enough friend, you'd probably know the answer by now, and the question would be moot. If I liked you and was feeling playful, I'd probably say something like "Let's go to bed and find out." If I liked you but wasn't up to answering, I'd probably say "Duh." If I didn't like you but was still in the mood for a mindfuck, I'd say "I am if you are, sport." And if I didn't like you at all and I was in a foul mood, I'd probably answer "What the hell kind of question is that, faggot?"

    Some people can answer the question with a simple yes or no. I choose not to be one of them.

  10. I made ala Dorian Corey hidden mummy out of the bunny. LOL!

  11. i'd gladly come out with those three. or two. ok, even with one of them.

  12. @ Sean : This is going to sound really shallow, but sometimes I wonder: if more good-looking, masculine men like these three came out, would more closeted gay men come out as well? I think this is partly why celebrities are often pressured to come out - so they could serve as some "role models" of sorts for those of us who are still confused/in denial/in hiding.

    One of my biggest fears when I was still in denial was that if people ever found out I liked guys, then they would lump me in with all those screaming beautician types, which were about the only kind of gay people known to society at large at the time. Not that there's anything inherently wrong with being a screaming beautician; it's just that it was not a demographic I felt I belonged to, nor one I wanted to be exclusively associated with. The very concept of a masculine man who just happens to prefer other men was just not comprehensible then as much as it is nowadays. Hence, all the hiding, hoping to run into someone "like me."

    And lest I be pilloried for this admission, it is a fact that there is stratification and discrimination within the LGBT community itself. Effems vs. pamintas, "straight-acting bis" vs. "out 'n proud", gymbuffs vs. everyone else, and so on.

    Not a perfect world we live in.

  13. All is said already. :) I respect everyone's decision to out and not to out.